There's no such thing as love
by weasleygurl4
Summary: Hermione has made a decision that will affect her forever. Will she realize that no one believes her decision is right? Chapter 2 up! Rated for attempted suicide and depression. R/R!!!!
1. Default Chapter

Hermione looked happily into her vanity. Tonight was the night, she thought. Tonight Ron was going to be hers. She looked into the mirror once more to make sure she looked good. She had hip huggers, a black and gold shirt that said angel, and her pumas. Her hair was straightened and she had new blonde highlights. She had one gold eyeliner and nude colored lip gloss. She looked in the mirror one last time and really did think she looked good, which was very surprising.  
  
When she got to the girls Gryffindor common room, pretty much everyone was there. Her best friends Ginny and Parvati came running up to her to say hello, but Lavender stayed sitting on the bed with Cho and Seamus. Hermione of course thought nothing of it and just sat down on the floor. The first hour of the party was very fun but then things got, bad. Seamus had somehow gotten hold of two twenty dollar bills. Cho and Lavender thought it would be hysterical to put the money down their shirts. Seamus apparently didn't care wear they were because he stuck his hand right down Cho's shirt and bra to get the money, but not before feeling Cho up first. Then Seamus did the same thing to Lavender and she squealed, "Ohhhh Seamus stop it!!" Hermione looked at them, but just shrugged it off. She didn't really like Seamus anyway. Hermione instantly got bored and went to go play on the computer. While she was sitting there, Lavender started acting extremely strange. She kept touching Ron and asking him questions, like if Lavender could paint his nails, or shave his legs, or if Ron could give her a back massage.  
  
Hermione stared at the computer in awe. Lavender had always hated Ron, always. She claimed that she would never like him and he was a stuck up tight wad. Hermione couldn't stand Lavenders giggling so she left the room and went down to the common room. It was sooo cute!! She thought. Oliver and Parvati had finally hooked up and they made the cutest couple. Hermione sighed wishing her and Ron could be like that. After a while she heard laughing coming from upstairs. She decided to go see what happened. It was one of the biggest shocks for Hermione. Cho, Lavender, and Ron were all laying under the covers in Lavender's bed. Cho was stroking Ron's hair and Lavender was stroking Ron's arm and calling him her baby. Hermione could not believe what was happening. She dropped the empty can she had and ran downstairs into the girls bathroom with tears streaming down her face. Ginny and Parvati ran after her and when they got to the bathroom Hermione was sobbing very loudly. They asked her what was wrong but all she could choke out was, " Go to the girls dorm." They looked at each other and ran upstairs to see what had happened.  
  
When they got there, they instantly knew why Hermione was crying. Mostly everyone knew about her crush on Ron. They both became extremely angry and so did some others. Oliver and Hermione had been very close, and the friendship between Harry and Hermione was self explanatory. Harry could not believe his ears when his girlfriend, Ginny, told him what happened. But both he and Ginny new that Ron was not one to care for a particular girl. When the party was over, Hermione finally left the bathroom. On her way to her dorm she ran into Lavender. "Wasn't that a great party!" Lavender asked with a smile. "Oh yea," Hermione said sarcastically, " It was the best time of my life." Lavender didn't notice the sarcasism and took Hermione aside. "Herm, I've got to tell you something," Lavender said. Hermione thought that maybe Lavender would apologize to her but instead. " I really like Ron," Lavender suddenly blurred out, "I mean I've always liked him but I've just started noticing the little things about him. And after what happened in the bed in all, I'm going to ask Ron out and be his girlfriend, and maybe even get married!" Hermione looked like someone had jammed a knife through her heart. With tears swelling quickly to her eyes she said, " Yea I am happy." Hermione grabbed a pen and paper and ran off to the lake. She quickly scribbled a note and left it by the lake. She then ran off into the woods, unnoticed and unseen. "Hey Lav," Ginny said through the famous Weasly gritted smile, " Have you seen Hermione?" "Yea," Lavender bounced up and said, " She took a pen and paper outside right after I told her that I love Ron and I was going to be his girlfriend. She must have been so happy she started to cry." Ginny immediately said, " Oh shit, you didn't!!" Without another word she ran to get Parvati, Harry, and Oliver. She told them, and they all raced down to try to find Hermione before it was too late. As soon as they got to the lake, Harry found a note. It said:  
  
Dear Whoever cares at this point,  
  
After what happened last night I realized something. I am a fool. A fool who had her sights set on an important Thing and then got turned down. I should of written this letter longer ago. Ginny, Parvati, Harry, and everyone who ever cared for me. I am sorry. I'm sorry for doing this to you but it seemed like the Only way out. Please don't blame yourselves, it is Not your fault. Mom and Daddy, I am sorry. It is not Your fault so please do not even think that way, but if You want to know what happened, please ask Ginny and Parvati. You can all try to look for me but I am gone. I will Be gone to a place where nothing like heartbreak even exists. Don't be sad and don't be angry, heck, maybe for some Of you, it is better off without me getting in the way Of your love. I am sorry, please forgive me.  
  
Love always, Hermione  
  
(**New chapter done. Don't worry Hermione doesn't die. I would never do that. But if your wondering where the plot for the first part came from, lets say that it happened to me. Before the whole note thing, I would be representing Hermione. But I'm over it and well, the new chapter will be coming soon. Pleaz review!! I hope you enjoyed it!!!**) 


	2. Hermione wakes up

**Ok chapter two, hope you all enjoy it! I do not own Harry Potter or any or his associates, I wish I did though!!**  
  
Chapter 2  
  
"Oh My God, Hermione!!" Harry yelled. Everyone heard him and looked at him, standing there yelling. People in the castle even started looking out the windows to see what he was yelling about. It just so happened that Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall were walking outside and after hearing Harry they came over to see what was going on. "Mr. Potter what is all the yelling about?" Professor McGonagall said in a concerned yet aggravated sort of way. Before Harry could say anything, Ginny immediately started talking "Hermione. Gone. left note. said...Gone. not coming back. suicide." It was all Ginny could say before she started sobbing and was embraced by Parvati in a hug. Professor McGonagall turned white and looked at Dumbledore in shock who was absolutely baffled. Professor McGonagall then said in a quiet voice, lower than she had ever talked before, "No it cannot be. There must be some mistake. Why would she." She was cut off by Harry who said, "She left this note." Professor McGonagall grabbed the note and she and Dumbledore both read it quickly. "Minerva gather the teachers together and please keep any word of this getting out secret." Dumbledore said. "Miss Hermione Granger has gone missing and we have only a short amount of time to find her before it is too late."  
  
Back in the Gryffindor common room, word about Hermione had not reached the students yet. Lavender and Ron were sitting on the couch near the fire. She had told him how she felt about him and he had admitted that he supposedly had the same feelings for her. He had his arm around her and they were both just sitting in silence, staring into the fire. Harry, Parvati, Ginny, and Oliver all came through the portrait hole a couple minutes later. Ginny's eyes were bloodshot and they all looked very tired. Oliver looked around, spotted Ron and Lavender, and then decided that he just wanted to go to sleep, so he went up the stairs to the boy's dormitory. Ginny looked at Ron and Lavender next and said in a sarcastic voice, "Oh what a pretty picture." As she walked up to the girls dorm Lavender said, "What's her problem? First she curses at me then she acts like a bitch to me." Parvati instantly saw the fury growing inside Harry so she jabbed him in the stomach and said, "She must be really tired, we were all out playing Quidditch, you know how she gets when she doesn't get enough sleep." Lavender then seemed happier and said, "Right. But why didn't you invite us? Ron is bloody brilliant at Quidditch!" She then kissed him, trying to show Harry and Parvati that she had told Ron how she felt. Parvati practically lost her cool when she snapped, "Well we didn't want to cut in on your fun." She then walked up to the girl's dorm and Harry walked up to the boy's dorm only after saying, "See ya Ron."  
  
While that was going on, half of the teachers and Filch had gone looking for Hermione, including M. They had been searching for well over 2 hours. Dumbledore had gone deep into the forest looking for Hermione when he saw a body lying behind a tree stump. It was in fact Hermione. Her body was barely visible to the normal eye, but because of a special charm that would allow him to see nearly everything that was well within 6 miles away. As soon as he had spotted her body, he used his wand to send a message to the other teachers that she had been found. Then with another wave of his wand they were both in the hospital wing of Hogwarts.  
  
While Hermione was still unconscious, Ron had found out about Hermione and asked if he could sit near her in the Hospital Wing. He sat next to her bed thinking why she would do such a thing. "Why did she try to kill herself?" Ron thought over and over again, it just didn't make sense. After a Hermione opened her eyes and saw Ron sitting next to her, just watching. She tried to move but her whole body ache and a good amount of it was in casts and bandages. "How are you feeling?" Ron asked. "Lavender told me that she had talked to you before she came to talk to me. She said you had gone for a walk." Hermione suddenly remembered what had happened and became furious at Ron, but she said in a quiet voice, "Why am I still alive??"  
  
Ron looked at her in a concerning way and said, "What???" "You don't get it do you? I tried to kill myself, and if the teachers hadn't cared so much, I would've been triumphant too." Hermione said. Ron couldn't believe what he was hearing. Hermione was saying she had tried to commit suicide. She always seemed to love life. "Hermione what are you saying??????" He said with almost anger in his voice. Hermione sensed the anger automatically and said furiously, "Don't you dare talk to me that way!!! You should know of all people! I don't know how you never figured out the feelings I had for you. I thought you were my dream guy, I thought that if I told you, you would say the same thing back. Then you and Lavender got into the bed together, you practically slept together!!!!  
  
Ron was in total awe while Hermione continued, "No one ever noticed that little bookworm Hermione had a crush on someone because everyone is better than I am!!! Well after you and Lavender almost did it, I figured, well if I'm only going to be known for how smart I am, then maybe life isn't as great as I thought it was. One thing led to another and before you know it, I was walking into the Forbidden Forest with a pen, a piece of paper, my wand, and a knife. I was so close to ending it all, but no, I am going to be in more pain than ever before!!!!!!!" Ron only managed to say, "Hermione, I." She stopped him mid sentence, "That is the least thing I need to hear, just leave me alone, I don't want to talk to anyone especially you and Lavender anymore She turned to the other side, no longer facing Ron, and tried to hide that she wasn't crying when she actually was. Madame Pomfrey came in and rushed Ron out saying that Hermione needed her rest and that he could come back later. Ron nodded and left, looking down at the floor. When he left he leaned against the wall not believing what he had heard. Hermione had tried to commit suicide, and it was his fault.  
  
**I hope you all liked this chapter. I must say that I have no hatred against Hermione, she is actually on of my favorite characters and I have no hatred towards any of the characters. I am a gigantic Harry Potter fan. Reviews are always welcome!!!** 


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